Anna Quindlen, columnist for Newsweek writes to the 2004 graduates.

"I'm so sorry. I look at all of you and realize that, for many, life has been a relentless treadmill since you entered preschool at the age of 2."

I never attended preschool. I don't think it even existed when I was a child. I do admit that I sent both of my children to preschool but it was at age Four, for 2 1/2 hours, two days per week.

"You all will live longer than any generation in history, yet you were kicked into high gear earlier as well. How exhausted you must be. Your college applications look like the resumes for midlevel executives. We boomer moms and dads had high expectations, ratcheted up by what the more honest of us must admit was something akin to competitive parenting. Soccer leagues. Language programs. Even summer camps that concentrate on college prep instead of sailing."

I admit that my sophomore daughter is already looking at colleges and careers. I have even suggested that she start to write down her accomplishments. As parents, my husband and I are very intentional about avoiding programs or opportunities that place too much value on acceleration and specialization.

"To the members of the class of 2004: putting a stop to this treadmill is like disarmament. Who dares to go first? A generation ago your parents, as a group, were known for wanting to give peace a chance in the world. Somehow we have raised a group that wants only a little peace in their own frantic lives. But peace is not what you see in the immediate future, for the world, for this nation or for yourselves. Instead, what stretches before you looks like a version of "Survivor" in street clothes. Find the job. Find the mate. Scale the ladder. Have the baby. Make the deal. Make the birthday cake. The gym, the Gap, the lover, the decor, the cuisine. Who will win the contest? Perhaps it will be those of you brave enough to stop moving."

Are we bad parents because we encourage our children to succeed? No. We can however, lose focus. Finding the right balance of achievements, encouragement, and simple down time can be challenging. Here too, I will admit, that I AM "brave enough to stop moving". I am willing to say NO to extra activities and commitments because . . . . . it brings peace into my families life.

See the full May 17 issue story.

Posted by Susan at 5/13/2004 09:31:06 AM | Link